Co-parenting in a Crisis

Co-parenting post-separation is not always easy. In a crisis, co-parenting can become even more challenging.

There are numerous people who navigate co-parenting their children just fine – often without the assistance of lawyers. During a crisis, many of these families will continue to operate in a reasonable, fair, respectful, kind and thoughtful manner. They will prioritize the needs of their children. They will support and facilitate co-parenting in a positive way. Some will also work to support each other personally as co-parents. That’s ideal. It does happen and it is happening.

However, where co-parenting was tumultuous and/or separation was also impacted by intimate partner violence or abuse pre-crisis, co-parenting can be a source of heightened fear, control and unsafety.

If you are facing violence or abuse by your ex-spouse or your child(ren) are facing abuse or being put at risk, it is important to get legal advice about your specific co-parenting situation. For more information:

  • Call 911 if you are in immediate danger
  • Battered Women’s Support Services – Call or text 604-652-1867 or send an email to intake@bwss.org
  • VictimLinkBC, a toll-free, confidential, multilingual telephone service available across B.C. and the Yukon 24 hours a day, 7 days a week – Call 1-800-563-0808 or send an email to VictimLinkBC@bc211.ca
  • BC Society of Transition Houses – Shelter and Emergency Resources – here.
  • Rise Women’s Legal Centre – Guidelines for Co-parenting – here.
  • Ending Violence Association of BC – Safety Planning – here.

Some court decisions provide insight into how co-parenting disputes will be determined.

The key points:

  1. Existing arrangements, such as the primary care role and time of a co-parent, will likely continue unless it can be evidenced that there is an impact on the best interest of the child.
  2. Any changes will need to be reasonable, practical and workable in light of the current crisis.
  3. Judges will want to see that parents are working in the best interest of their child(ren) and they are able to communicate with each other.
  4. Where a parent is operating in the best interest of their child(ren), their parenting time should continue and not be restricted by the other parent.

See: S.R. v. M.G., 2020 BCPC 57 (CanLII), (no family violence) and M.D.F. v D.O.T.C, 2020 BCSC 522 (CanLII), (family violence raised)

Zara Suleman practices family law and fertility law and is the founder of the law firm, Suleman Family Law. She is also a certified family law mediator and collaborative law practitioner. Zara has also been actively involved in presenting, training, writing and editing materials on family law issues. She has done extensive professional development and academic research in the areas of family violence, specifically violence against women and children. Prior to law school Zara was a front-line community advocate for over a decade, working extensively on issues involving violence against women and children, anti- racism, immigrant and refugee issues. Zara has had her short stories, poetry, articles and research accepted to various publications across Canada and the United States. Zara was awarded the 2018 Equality & Diversity Award from the Canadian Bar Association BC Branch. Zara's professional website is at - sulemanfamilylaw.com -